Monday, April 9, 2012

Firsts...

I love the innocence of "firsts". First kisses... first crushes... first dates.  It doesn't matter how old you are, there's just something about them that brings you back to being really young. At least, that's what it does to me; back to the pre-teen days. Even chatting with my girl friends when they come home from dates is exciting to me. Times have changed, but first dates always make me feel romantically pulled back to the days of black and white movies, kisses at the drive-in, sweaty hands and all. Things I've never had but I highly romanticize in my mind.

This blogger is a sucker for romance. I won't lie. Give me a cheesy love story or a romantic comedy and I'm happy, within reason of course. That's why I fall so hard for Television shows where I relate to the girl who wants the guy but never really gets the guy. Or, if she does, it's fleeting. Welcome to my life. I'm just an Angela Chase pining over a Jordan Catalano that I'll never quite have...

That's a My So Called Life reference in case you missed it.
 
I am a hopeless romantic; one that knows that relationships take work and commitment.  I’m the girl who’s seen the worst in love and has set high standards for myself so that I will, hopefully, never have to “go there”.  As a result, I’m single, and perhaps doomed with it.

Even though I’m well out of the running for dating and marriage these days, I still daydream about it…

“And then, just like that they were kissing. She didn't know how they got there. She had no idea. The thought of kissing this boy hadn't crossed her mind in years, which was weird, because once upon a time, that was all she ever thought about. And then, just like that, it was over. He coughed, she shuffled her feet... And she laughed to herself. It had been one of those moments, one of those moments where you shuck your status as mere mortal and achieve, however briefly, true greatness. She had shared many such moments with this boy, but now he was leaving and... Nothing would ever be the same again.”


I suppose that’s what shows like Dawson’s Creek are for; hopeless romantics who like to look back on the days when life seemed like complicated mess of teenaged angst, hormones and awkwardness, but in reality…it was beautiful.  Messy, but beautiful just the same.

Gone are the days and nights of walking to the basketball courts, or the grocery store to see my crush play ball and bag groceries in his super cute work-enforced bow-tie.  Those Summer evenings of walking along side him while he walked his bike and we talked.  Endless conversations late at night while laying on the floor, attached to the phone by a spiral cord that easily wrapped around ones finger. 

Love is so much fun in the start, isn’t it?  What I wouldn’t give to go back to those days…

4 comments:

Lily Cate said...

We belong to a very, very specific slice of our generation that knows a So Called Life reference when we see one.

Heidi said...

And for that reason we are more than "extra" special.

Tina said...

1. I was going to say, being Angela isn't so bad, she got to make out with Jordan a lot. :)
2. You should be a writer. ;)
3. I think you would be even more fabulous than you are already if you lived in the 50's era.... I can just see you there... poodle skirts, drive-in, sharing a soda pop with a beau.... (well at least from this post anyway)

Heidi said...

Tina, that's my heart. Oh, to live in the 50s era... You hit the nail right on the head with that one.